Confuzzled

“I wanna stay inside all day
I want the world to go away
I want blood, guts, and chocolate cake
I wanna be a real fake
Yeah, I wish I’d been, I wish I’d been, a teen, teen idle
Wish I’d been a prom queen, fighting for the title
Instead of being sixteen and burning up a bible
Feeling super, super, super suicidal“
-Marina

I miss the winter skies. I wish time would just freeze and calm itself. I miss the world moving at my pace. The skies are so angry and sad these days. They are so off balance.


Lol, so the coworker that I have been connecting with, I am fairly sure he likes me, which isn’t what I want or need right now. It could never work with him, he has two kids and is currently living with his ex wife. He has a lot that he needs to work on. He is capable of achieving a lot, I think he just needs someone to believe in him. After all, I didn’t start achieving anything until I had friends who pushed me to be better. Do those of us who have never had a good support system or good friends, do we naturally fall in love with those that first show it? That feels too dependent.


I am feeling okay today, my mind feels slower today. Closing the store four nights in a row can really mess with the sleep schedule, but I have been sleeping so that is good. I have training for the school bus this afternoon. Turns out I don’t work every night this week, just Friday- Sunday. I am actually okay with that, after dealing with idiots this weekend I will fully enjoy the break. Also, I think maybe my coworker needs a break from me, like so he can hopefully reevaluate his thinking. I don’t think he would be a bad guy to date, he is fairly moody but I think that is just the weight of life. We are just on different playing fields.


The farmers market is coming. I am excited, farm fresh food here I come! Its next weekend I believe. I killed the food I was trying to grow lol. Oh well, next year. I think I will have to move to get a better deal apartment. They will probably keep this apartment the same price even though the value is dropping. Theres a lot of new development with nicer apartments for around the same price. I might want something closer to the school busses, or at least where I don’t have to get on a messy interstate connection in the mornings.


Thats really all I have today folks. My mind is kinda just confuzzled today, like, it just needs a break. More later 🙂

Have a good day peeps

Published by unbreakablekitten

Headed East towards the horizon

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