It is a coffee type of morning. Partly because I have no tea and party because I have spent the past two days sick. I know I seem to get sick a lot, I blame it on working in a confined space with other constantly sick people but this is probably the worst I have been in a long time. My throat feels like strep throat which the doctor concluded was not, I have had the worst migraine, my eyes hurt, whole body aches, I can barely move my head because my lymph nodes are so swollen. I have pretty much been living on NyQuil, DayQuil, Airborne, and water. I have started to try and gargle with salt water. My mom said to do this and I have read it helps kill the virus. I am pretty sure I have had a high fever too with how much I have been sweating in my sleep but I don’t own a thermometer. I am not sure what owning one would do since I know to keep myself cool when I feel a fever and if a fever is so high I need to go to the E.R. I live alone so chances are I would be too far gone to drive. Mother Nature also seemed to gift me with my cycle too. So yeah, I am drinking coffee in hopes that it gives my body the energy it needs to say fuck you to the virus, because sometimes coffee can be magical like that.
It is such a beautiful sunny day out. What is an absolute bummer is I planned to go to Fergus Falls today to take pictures of the sanitarium there. Well, maybe tomorrow. I used to deliver mail in Fergus Falls, I would detail there from Grafton. I fell in love with it pretty quickly, its full of hills, lakes, and Victorian homes. What really caught my eye was the asylum there.
I believe last year is when they started periodic demolition on the site. Fergus Falls isn’t a huge community and I think they were finding it cost more to keep it up and could not find any use of most of the structure. I am hoping I can still get some good pictures though. I hope they started demolition in the back rather than the front. This building is huge though, I remember being struck in awe the first time I noticed it. I like good ghost stories and whatnot but I don’t really believe this place is haunted. The locals had little ghost stories here and there but I think it was more made up, every small town has their own. An interesting story though, which isn’t really a ghost story just probably a weird coincidence was there was a murder suicide in 2017 in one of the apartments that used to be a nurses ward I believe. I am going by pure memory.
So 1447 Patterson Loop is where the murder suicide was. As you can see it is a part of the sanitarium grounds. They are beautiful apartments though, I would love to live in them. Fergus Falls is absolutely beautiful. I have attached an article about the incident. It’s nothing overly spooky, pretty normal actually; abusive relationship that turns deadly.
I would just love to get my own pictures of the grounds before they are completely demolished, which I hope they aren’t already. It has been a few years since I have been there. I just remember a beautiful eerie morning when I was delivering mail. There are so many lakes in the area that in spring there gets to be a lot of fog. I was driving around the sanitarium because there’s human services and whatnot around it whom get mail. The trees were bare from the winter and the air was musty and foggy. I remember seeing the asylum in front of me clouded in fog. I literally felt like I was in a horror movie. It was absolutely beautiful but eerie.
Tomorrow should be warmer so hopefully I can get there. I really need to get to feeling better.
I am not sure if I every mentioned my grandfather was in a sanitarium. He had T.B. and so had to stay in one in Dunseith.
San Haven has tons of ghost stories associated with it. I do not think it was one of the nicer asylums so that could be why but also it also sits close to the Turtle Mountain reservation. I think anywhere that has Native Americans is going to have ghost stories. Its just a thing of ours I guess lol. Mix a creepy building in and your have yourself hundreds of ghost stories.
My mom toured San Haven when she was a little girl in middle school. She said she remembers a floor, I think the third, that was for the mentally disabled people. She said it was a different time and it was not bad for them to be locked up so she did not see anything wrong with it. She just saw them as funny I think, probably most of the kids did and chances are the nurses did too. She was also a child and could probably not understand the bigger picture of human rights. I should ask her more about what she remembers of it. I know my grandfather was there for about 7 years if my memory serves me right. Some of it has been torn down now I think since it is crawling with asbestos. I think there are ghost tours for parts of it still.
The coffee does seem to be helping me wake up a bit but I do still feel cruddy. I think Bailey has been kinda sick too. He has had the runs and has some flem vomits. I think we both are just ready for it to get nicer so we can go outside more. Fresh air is great for health and these mega sub zero windchills are just terrible for the body and great for viruses.
I suppose I should be happy I haven’t had an interview this week. No one wants to go to an interview when they feel like shit. Still bummed though. I had one rejection but that is okay because it was more secretary I think which I honestly probably wouldn’t have been happy with. Theres three that I am hopeful for that I know I will probably like. I haven’t had any rejections which is good I guess. Bills are being paid later and later though. I suppose I am paying things off too but there’s only so long you can put off other bills before they get pissy.
I think I will write a fictional book soon. I am working on the outline at the moment and trying to figure out the details. I have a decent plot though I think. I was hoping to work on it with my long weekend but unfortunately I do not know how much I will get done.
My body needs to hurry up and get better so I can hit the gym again, this is annoying.
I got served with papers today, nothing I wasn’t expecting. I was just expecting to have a second job by now so I could have shit paid off by now or at least be making payments. Nothing I can do about it right now, I actually feel to weak right now to even really care.
I know I need to eat, just it hurts to even swallow so eating seems more like a chore. I could eat a lot of oatmeal I guess. Add almond milk so I can get some calcium in and vitamins. I have a banana left and that will be easy on the throat and tummy. Its too easy not to eat anything though.
Apologies if there seems to be more blabber than a point today. I really just am not feeling well. I think I will find something to watch and do absolutely nothing. I hope you guys find the sanitariums as fascinating as I do, I enjoy weird things like that and creepy history. Good day to all. I will post the next day in my book when I am able to get my butt off the couch. 🙂
P.S. Feel free to add me on Snapchat Kitten0080. I am trying to snap more but if I start going to places that I plan to I will probably have more stories to share.
Also, thank you to all who is reading my book. I hope it is helping you understand the mind of someone who has suffered from BPD or other issues.