Unbreakable Kitten

Juxtaposition, Contradictory, Dichotomy


We Define Ourselves

I have been told what readers like about me is that I am real and human, in a sense that I document my up and down days, and because of that I am relatable. I suppose there are many blogs where people seem chipper all the time, I used to think that because I had a borderline personality that it was a handicap and the reason why I could not be happy, but I am starting to think that it is just another label and doesn’t define me. After reading my book and going over my blogs, and realizing how far I have come, I do not think it is a handicap at all, but just another struggle to overcome and I truly believe that I am. It is very possible to even overcome BPD. Maybe it develops because something was lost in a life or forgotten, or maybe something has yet to be found. Maybe that is almost any disorder or addiction for that matter.

Alcoholism/ addiction is usually brought on by some sort of depression, stress, personality/ behavioral disorder, trauma, biological, often the way to “cure” it is by gong to AA and finding god because god cures everything. What I hate about this is it indirectly says that someone who doesn’t have god will fail. That’s a lot of people that are left without hope. I believe that everyone needs a belief foundation, whether its god, energy, science, allah, Buddhism, anything that gives you meaning to your life. Humans need meaning in their life.

Stress is easier to handle when there is meaning because with meaning goals form. It might start out small and seem nonexistent at the time, after all, mine was getting pregnant with my daughter, and even though I chose adoption I still didn’t know if it would work out so worked two jobs in case I had to parent. At that time life was very stressful but I was able to push it aside for my daughter. My daughter was my belief during that time because she was the only thing in my life that I knew existed and so I was going to fight for her. Of course my beliefs have grown, but that was the start.

Depression can be helped tremendously by having a spiritual foundation and goals. When my parents feel depressed they take their meds and pray. God and pills are their beliefs. When I feel depressed I blog and meditate with my crystals. There is no right or wrong if it works for you and has no physical or mental damage.

Trauma?  Sure, sucks. You have to want to get better though. Rape, molestation, beatings, abuse, far too many of us go through this, but seriously, GET OVER IT. You have to if you have any chance of surviving! Victims will only fall.

I wont mention much on biological traits, after all, deaf people can write symphonies (Beethoven), schizophrenics can discover math equations (John Nash) , autistics can build empires (Bill Gates).

Personality disorder? Behavioral Disorder?  Forget it, its a label, it doesn’t define you. If you have a foundation of beliefs and goals than a personality/behavioral “disorder,” is just a hurdle you overcome. I am not trying to make light of  disorders, but if you let them be a handicap than you will always be a handicap and will never go anywhere. It’s not easy to overcome, after all I am almost 30 and finally feel free. Take the programs if needed, write, read, draw, stay sober, do what you know you need to do even if your mind tries to say otherwise. Get out of your comfort zone, your comfort zone is most likely toxic. Also I say if needed on the programs because they never worked for me, instead hypnotherapy really jumpstarted a lot of healing. But you do you, its your mind, your recovery, your life. You need to figure it out though.

Sorry if its a lot of blabber, there is point I am trying to make, I might be failing lol.  I just don’t like labels sounding like handicaps. Alcoholic, abuse victim, tweaker, manic, antisocial, depression, bulimic, cutter, don’t let your label be another handicap, it might be a statistic, but everyone has the capability of beating those odds.

One step forward, two steps back, running start, fall off the cliff, try again, if you keep trying, you will reach the other side, that I promise.


Posted Day 6 today for Sixty earlier 🙂



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About Me

An English diarist and naval administrator. I served as administrator of the Royal Navy and Member of Parliament. I had no maritime experience, but I rose to be the Chief Secretary to the Admiralty under both King Charles II and King James II through patronage, diligence, and my talent for administration.

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